Poetry

The Next Day

Here it is

I’m given my first chip

First day of sobriety

I look at it,

hold it in my hand,

close to me.

I cannot tell you how I get here

The hell I put in

High all day

zonked out all night.

Days go by

as fast as the rails I snort up.

Minute after minute,

jonesin

Doin whatever I could to get my fix

Didn’t matter what time it was

12 Noon

5:40

11:50

I’m trying to score.

Either the brown tar that feeds my veins,

or the white girl that I soar with

up, up, and away.

But after years and years

of abusing my body,

my family turning their back on me,

every ounce,

inch,

centilla of dignity gone.

When I have spent months

after months inside

looking at myself,

hitting rock bottom,

I want to try something else.

I want to give myself,

my body,

my mind,

a day without mind altering substance.

A life without drugs,

a fresh start,

thats why I am here.

Clearing  out all of the bs,

beginning a new,

and it starts with this chip.

One day clean

as I look towards

the next day.

 

Pipe Dreams

Where I come from,

you can look at crack rock two ways:

Either to come up

or it’s the death of you.

I see hella people servin,

gettin money

fly cars

jewelry

women

and I think to myself,

why the man across the street aint think of that.

Why he bummy,

looking rageddy,

tore up,

smoked up.

That goes through my mind.

This crack,

it’s the divider,

the line.

The indicator of the haves and havenots.

Little Jerry on Rawaway

done sold all of his stuff,

and sometimes his self for a hit.

The guy who served him for a hit,

he done got his family out of the projects,

livng where the white folks live,

drive what the white folks drive,

eating where the white folks eat.

All because of this rock.

Damn!

Can’t people see?

Why be strung out looking like the dead?

When you can sell it and get paid?

My man T’s Father done got skinny as heck off bassin.

Scars on his neck from fighting,

fingertips all burnt from them matches.

Hair in patches.

But check this,

the local Dboys got fat,

Gaining weight because they eating good.

Jewelry shinning got them looking good.

The dope just them living good.

Man,

it’s like either you selling or you snorting,

you got it or you don’t.

There aint no middlenground messing the rock.

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