All We Really Need Is Love excerpt: Edgar, 21

Posted: October 26, 2015 in All We Really Need Is Love, Books, interview

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Edgar, 21

communication is key…that and sex

I grew up in San Francisco but moved to El Cerrito when I was six. I have six siblings, one older and the rest younger. My folks are from Mexico and have that old school type of thing where they’re still together. My grandparents are still together too.

Being a young guy in The Bay feels good. I hang with my friends and go to clubs in the city or hit a rave real quick. When we turn up like that, we’ll go to the store and buy some stuff and chill. I don’t drink that much though.

What are the girls like?

They all vary. I’ve had all types of women. It all depends on where you live it. Like if you are here in the city, they are more open minded and willing to have fun. If you suggested something fun, they wouldn’t be the ones to say, “Turn it down.” East Bay girls, like a girl from Richmond, is more ghetto, like ratchet you know? I’ve been dealing with that my whole life so I recognize what’s real. I’ve also dealt with girls in Sacramento, Davis, Concord, and around those areas. The girls are a lot different and a lot more classy. They know how to handle themselves.

I had my first girlfriend when I was a junior in high school. We met at a quinceanera that I was invited to by my homegirl. When she had to dance at the party, I was partnered with Daisy, who would later be my girlfriend. Daisy was Latina; I couldn’t remember if she was Salvadorian or Mexican but definitely Latina. She had long straight hair, big brown eyes, nice curves, painted eyebrows, and was a soccer player so she was definitely in shape. Our relationship lasted almost two months and everything was new to me. It  was like, “Wow,” I finally got one with nobody’s help. I got Daisy on my own based on everything I experienced, watched, and learned from.

Dating Daisy taught me that when you get to know someone, anything can happen. There is no right or wrong when you are with someone you trust.

I can dig that.

And also, don’t try to fall too hard too quick. You do that shit to yourself – you just always just end up bad. After breaking up with Daisy, it took me a month to get over it once I got back in school.

But you bounced back though.

Oh yeah, once I was in school with like 20, 24 other girls, I loved going there everyday. School kept me occupied, so I got over it, moved on, and boom – talked to other girls.

Do you have a girlfriend now?

Yes, you could say we are together, but it’s complicated. I met her while going to the Art Institute; she was in two of my classes. I kinda noticed her and I know she noticed me, but I didn’t go up to her. When I got home, I looked her up on Facebook, added her and she added me.

Today’s dating…(laughs)

That’s how it happened, on Facebook. I liked that she was into Japanese anime and to be honest, she looked like something out of an anime cartoon. She has bleached hair and rocked it in Asian style. On our first date I took her to the Westfield food court to grab something to eat, and then we went to a movie. After that we were together. This August will be one year for us.

The thing that makes our relationship complicated is her ex. It’s on some other shit. She told me on our first date that she had recently broken up with her boyfriend and what’s crazy is, her twin sister is still involved with him.

Wow, that’s…interesting…

Yeah. He was crazy jealous. Before we were together we would text back and forth. One day he saw it and broke her phone. Dude is a douche (laughs). He is an old Asian looking guy who’s probably in his 30’s.

So 30 is old (laughs)?

Look, I’m 21 and after 30 I consider you old (laughs). So when her and the ex-boyfriend started dating, she introduced him to her twin sister. They got along well and boom, they became a thing. He was pretty much dating both of them. He is that type of guy that can talk shy people into doing things. My girl is shy, quiet, and into drawing, so he saw that and went for her. After meeting her sister, he was just like, “Why don’t we date each other.”

That’s kinda incestuous….

Yeah, she fell for it because she is really attracted to Asian guys.

Is she Asian?

No she is actually mixed, half Native American and half Puerto Rican.

One thing is my girlfriend is really into Asian fashion culture.  She likes K-Pop bands and their style of dress. The way the guys use the eyeliner, the earrings, and have that gentlemen look: she digs that. But she is also into Latino men too, because her boyfriend before the Asian guy was Latino.

Things got heated one day when we were chilling at her apartment, and her ex busted in trying to beat her and I up to a bloody pulp. He was not over the fact that he lost her to me, so he didn’t take it well. He got all pissed because she was happy with me, so it got crazy. To get back at my girl after they broke up, he kept sleeping with her sister. What’s frustrating to her is she broke up with him because he hurt……….

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